Monday, December 22, 2008

The Curious Case of the Christmas Crankies

If you hear "HO HO HO!!" and then feel your stomach turning, then you know you're getting the Christmas crankies. Maybe you run out of tape while wrapping the gifts and you start cursing up a storm because you have to go all the way down stairs and run back up before the kids notice what you're doing. It also possible that it started when you waited too long to put up the tree and decorate and now you have even more stupid Christmas things to do while you also still need to do your school work, get some sleep, work your job, make dinner and also fold the friggin' laundry!

Or perhaps it was the 24th time you heard a rendition of Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree and you then screamed at your spouse for forgetting the butter at the store. After all, how the fuck else are you gonna make the goddamned cookies?! It's Christmas after all and you just gotta make cookies cause everyone's expecting you to do it! It's for the kids after all!! Even though those ungrateful little brats ran out of the house to their friends as soon as they finished licking the batter off the beater. So much for having fun with the kids who are now "too old" for that kind of stuff now and they don't even want to help make a stupid batch of cookies that you could've just bought at the Acme!! Plus your mother keeps calling from the toy store and asking you the stupidest questions about what the kids want when you clearly told her about five times before. Obviously, she doesn't understand the difference between a Bakugan and Pokemon but what the fuck else you gonna tell her to get?! It's not like the kids will accept any old toy these days, they're too "sophisticated" and will whine if they don't get what they want exactly because the stupid twerps don't appreciate what their parents and grandparents do for them! Plus some imaginary magical fat guy gets all the credit anyways!! *

If that's what happened, then you definitely have a case of the Christmas crankies.

*please note that the preceding paragraph was fictionalized and although it may seem completely possible, it was , in fact, a made up story that was based in some reality and events over the past few Christmases. Brian does love his spouse but thinks that she overworks herself during the holidays (especially this year when she's also in school while working) and is trying his best to help out and doesn't care that he occasionally gets screamed at for little things and understands that she needs to blow off some steam.

No comments: